34

I've been 34 for five days and I have to say, it's a lot different than 33. WOW. Okay, it's exactly the same. Except I'm upping my calcium intake because my mom told me on my birthday that I'm at risk for osteoporosis now. I bought a strawberry smoothie yesterday and imagined my brittle bones crumbling inside my legs while drinking it. It is possible that with age comes more exaggeration.

Something else that isn't going away anytime soon is the unicorn theme begun last year when Gus and Matthew, several months and time zones apart, spontaneously started referring to me as a unicorn. Like bacon, unicorns are hip now but I don't care. I'll own it. And that's why I also now own Good vs. Evil unicorn plastic toys, a t-shirt that says that I would look cooler if I were riding a unicorn and my birthday present come in envelopes like this.

In addition to many sweet birthday phone calls and text messages and holy crap, the outpouring on Facebook, I got a amazing cards from Carl "Even if it was in haste I'm glad your parents had unprotected sex around nine months prior to your birthdate" Rogers and Ali "You would have loved the gift I didn't bother getting you" Schumacher. And Jocardo has shown me why video stores become obsolete.

And I would like to say, as someone who is: a) a confirmed grinch b) gets all shitty about attention (and yet blogs thereby drawing attention to myself, hm) c) loves giving gifts but forgets a lot of birthdays so as my friend you're more likely to get some random thing in the mail for no reason, THANK YOU. x