laughing quietly to myself

About the girl in the convenience store next to my laundromat who said to the woman behind the sandwich counter, "I'm TRYING to UNDERSTAND how you could only put mayonnaise on one side of my sandwich..."

And when the woman gave her two packets of mayo, "This sandwich is DRY AS SHIT."

I played it cool and avoided eye contact because I was afraid a) that I would laugh and b) that she would punch me in the throat.

I ordered my own sandwich, went back to the laundromat, and was eating it when the girl walked in with her friend, "And I SAID, you don't know what to do with BOTH PIECES OF BREAD?"

That is a sandwich gangsta.